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Hi There, I'm Kris. I'm a quirky sort who loves silly jokes, sunflowers, music, divine interruptions and music. I am devoted to my nerdly, ginger-haired husband, our 3 living & growing kids, and missing our 1 Babe in Heaven. We journey together through this life, dancing to our own beat, while learning each step as my children and I are effected by a life-threatening & degenerative chronic illness called Ehlers Danlos Syndrome (EDS). Please look on the "What is Ehlers Danlos Syndrome" to the bottom right of the page to learn more about EDS. I believe I have been given this journey in order to over come it, and this is my story of how I get it done.

Wednesday, December 14, 2011


It turns out my icky-not-feeling-good feeling was the beginning of a bug; I still feel like poo...and the structure, or lack of in this blog post will probably show it.

You ever put something off for no good reason except you just REALLY DIDN'T WANNA DO it?
This elusive something that is not especially difficult physically or even mentally, but for some reason the thought of doing it STRESSES you out so much that you have already decided you're not going to do it today before the thought has finished materializing in your mind?  
I've noticed when I am extraordinarily stressed-out (like being sick on top of having a chronic illness & pain, while still having to work as if you're not & make tasty preparations for the holiday's festivities for all of the kid's functions & help them get over the triumph/loss over a pair of our favorite furry foster pets getting adopted), the smallest, silliest & easiest things feel like a HUGE mountain standing before me, blocking out everything pleasant in my view.  There are 2 different tasks that I've been putting because of these very reasons, and for some reason, it took getting sick (just another added stressor) for me to finally say f@%$-it and just get it done:
#1 Mailing in my insurance claim forms for a car accident I was in last August which caused horrendously painful whiplash (not sure if it's anymore painful from anyone else's whiplash- but having never had a problem with pain in my neck/back- I've been appalled by how painful it is) car damage and BILLS for which I should be reimbursed since I was rear-ended by an person talking on their mobile and not noticing the cute little Volkswagen in front of her.  I hope her insurance company doesn't give me any trouble, I just want to be paid back what I had  to pay.
#2 Is to just throw a dart and make an appointment with a new GP- ANY GP just to get my search going again.  This is certainly the most daunting to nearly everything on my to-do list, but it's also one of the more crucial tasks that I accomplish; I've been putting off for a year.  That's right, 1 year.   That is just how bad all of the previous Dr.' s I've tried have been- I hate it.  It's just too easy to find something else important to do instead of this; like making sure my kids are up to day on all of their appointments, etc.  My husband said something to me on our anniversary that changed my mind, something unexpected because we've had such a rough go of live for the last 18 months (since he lost his job & was forced to leave home, where I had been for 10 years and into the work force as the family bread winner) and also in our marriage; it turns out, he's terrified of my death.  I had no idea (I know that sounds silly), I really didn't have a clue.  I really only express about 20% of what EDS does to me to the people closest to me in life because I don't want to overwhelm or over burden them, apparently that hasn't worked on my husband.  Suddenly, because it's for him, finding a Dr. to make an appointment with didn't seem so hard.  Let's see how I feel next week when it's time to actually GO to my first consult.  Ugh.  I love my husband.

So I did both.  My anxiety over next week's new Dr. appt. is at an okay level right now, but that will probably change...I hate everything about being in a Dr's office/hospital- the needle sticks are the easy part for me; I hate having to explain my EDS to someone who may or may not care- it sucks ass.

I really hope this bug doesn't fully get me down, I feel pretty wretched, but with my Office holiday party on Friday, kid's holiday concerts everywhere I see, and our Furry Foster Pooches being adopted tomorrow and EDS's every-day antics, I just don't have the time or the energy.  Fa-la-la-la *cough* la-la-la *wheeze*

1 comment:

  1. Hey Kris - Hope you feel better. It sucks to be sick during the holidays! And I totally understand the thing about just not wanting to do stuff. It happens to me ALL the time. It is really stupid on my part but I get it.

    I understand too what your husband is feeling. I felt the same thing when my wife got sick. But I don't know much about the syndrome you have, but I can't help but think you will be just fine!